I've started this blog to amalgamate the 3 I have been writing since June. One is about me trying to change to a raw food diet, the second is about my family and our life in France and the other is about me trying to give up drinking, intially just about the alcohol but I know realise I have a big problem with caffeine in the form of 10 mugs of tea a day. All in all I've been trying to get fit and healthy but have been scuppering all my efforts with the booze and tea. I decided to stop drinking 2 weeks ago as I knew it was the only chance I had of getting fit to run a marathon at the end of October. I signed up in April and got off to a good start then things slipped in a busy summer. I managed 7 days without a drink then slipped up, since then its a day on a day off kind of thing. I've stopped for short spaces of time many times before and have always found it easier without the tea. That just seems to set up more cravings. Then I go for the sugar and bread. My conversion to raw diet was going well until I stopped drinking then I found that nothing satisfied the cravings and I was comfort eating again. The priority now is to get clear of the addictions or at least get through the first days and get back into raw food. It is so much tastier and full of goodness than cooked.
Last night I was searching on the net and was reminded of glycerine and it ability to give energy but bypassing the sugar metabolism in the body and therefore helping with cravings. It also explained how drinkers use alcohol to create energy as their bodies don't manage to create the lactic acid or ethanol that it should make. That will explain why lacto fermented drinks are so good for you and perhaps why sport makes you feel good. I had a spoonfull of glycerine last night and took another mixed with water up to bed with me, which I drink at 4 am and at 8 am. I have been so thirsty today its unbelievable. I've drunk loads of water, rejuvelac and carrot juice but not tea and yet the thirst doesn't seem to be going and I can feel the tea addict in me trying to persuade me that I'll feel better if I have a cuppa. I might try it later when a friend comes.
This morning I bought 3 hypnosis MP3's. One for reducing alcohol abuse, another for alchol withdrawal and another for caffeine addiction. I've listened to them all once, although the last one was a little disturbed by the baby waking up. I have three children. E, F and G. Gwilym is 9 months, Eben is 3 and a half and Flo is 8. Since searching the net for forums to help addicts I have found that there are so many women out there with drink problems, many like me are mothers to small children and like me suffering with the guilt of being addicted and being a mother too. To someone without a problem its easy to say why don't you just stop your children are so precious, they are but just as they are so precious alcohol is a very powerfull drug and not easy to give up. But it can be done and I'm sure I'll get there this time. I've more help than ever before. Reading a book called 'Give up drinking 4 life, easily' has changed the way I see alcohol addiction and has allowed me to come out here and start writing this more openly. Hopefully it will help me and my family and help others to to let go of the stigma.